I Get By With A Little Yelp From My Friends

What do you do when you're in an unfamiliar place and need something to eat?  Pick at random? Go to a fast food place or other big chain, so that you at least know what you're getting even if it isn't very good? Or try to talk to the locals and find someplace interesting and hopefully amazing?

I often research before I go, but sometimes things happen at the spur of the moment.  So, I usually use online reviews, mainly Yelp.  I've been using them for almost five years.  I started when I needed to find places to eat in the middle of barren Indiana.  I go to Wisconsin a lot, from Ohio, and I can find places on both ends and in Chicago.  But what the heck is in Indiana?  I tried Urbanspoon, Yahoo, etc., but their coverage was sparse.  Yelp had not just more reviews, and but more in-depth reviews.

After a few months I decided to pay back by reviewing places I went, and I've never stopped.  Yelp has helped me find great places, and I hope I've helped others find more.  The community is generally friendly and helpful.  It's really just an extension of "word of mouth"- even if you don't know anyone local, you can learn what they think about a place.  Hey, if I have a good or bad experience at a place, I'm going to tell people- in person or online.  If you, as a business owner, have a problem with that, maybe you need to spend your energy fixing your place rather than complaining about a bad review.

Yes, Yelp has seen some controversy, about review fraud (from both Yelp and businesses) and Yelp pushing businesses to advertise.  There have been lawsuits, generally dismissed, and I've never seen any pushiness or harassment.  If a business gets bad reviews, they probably deserve it and need to work on things.  If they get great ones, they deserve them too.  In either case the public needs to know about them.  And if you actually read the reviews, you can tell pretty quickly when one is overly fawning or unfairly negative.   Read and learn, and decide for yourself.  I would much rather read a hundred reviews and decide based on a ton of information than have no idea what a place is like.  Is picking at random good for consumers?  Or even businesses?  If you have a great product, don't you want the free advertising that word of mouth and its modern equivalents bring? And sometimes things change over time, so a good review in the local paper from five years ago will mislead you into thinking a place is still great, or vice-versa.

Some people hate Yelp, and online reviews in general.  I don't get that.  I love reading reviews in the local paper, but they can't hope to visit all the restaurants in town, or try every single item on the menu.  It's not like movie reviews, with a relatively limited number of releases that are the same across the country.  One benefit of crowdsourcing is that there are so many people "working" to find information.  With the food industry in particular there are always places popping up, and closing, so you can never keep up.  But online reviews come close.  Some people think crowdsourcing takes advantage of people, who are doing work for free.  But if they want to do it, or don't think of it as work, what is the issue?  Does it bother you that Facebook makes money off your birthday posts and cat pictures?  That Twitter makes money from your comments about TV shows?  How are you being hurt?

I have found so many cool places- restaurants, museums, parks- with the help of Yelp.  And as you can tell I like writing, so I also enjoy contributing my observations and sharing cool places with others.  I don't understand the hate for Yelp, and online reviews in general.  More information is better.  The good and bad need to be heard.

I am in Yelp's hometown of San Francisco right now, enjoying music and I am sure some good local food.  The pic below is actually from Columbus, Ohio, but something Asian will probably be in the mix in SF.  And maybe seafood?  Sourdough?  I'll find something good to eat, with any means at my disposal...

Smokin'

I love barbecue.  Now, let's define that.  We need to be clear what we're talking about.  When someone says "I'll call you in the morning" I ask "what do you mean by morning?" because I am a night owl, and anything before noon is too early for me...  When I say barbecue (or BBQ, or however you want to spell it) I mean meat cooked slowly, with smoke.  Not a steak on a grill ("cooking out," "grilling,") not barbecue sauce on baked chicken.  I like that stuff too, but it's not barbecue.  I mean smoked meat.  Oh, with the odd vegetable thrown in, maybe.  I've only done a little barbecuing myself; I leave it to the experts.  I've tried it in all the major American regions: Memphis, Kansas City, North and South Carolina, Chicago.  Only big one I've missed is Texas, and I'm there right now.  I still want to try Kentucky mutton (I've had it in Ohio, and it was good.)  I've had Korean BBQ and love it.   I'll try it anywhere and everywhere, whatever cut or species you want to cook up.  I've had it in fancy places, at shacks, and in peoples' backyards.  I love it.

Barbecue started as just meat over a fire, and the tougher cuts needed longer, slower heat to become tender.  That led to smoke infusing the meat, and techniques and flavors just took off from there.  Today, the best BBQ is pretty close to the original simplicity- good meat, over good wood, for a long time.  A few seasonings, maybe, but not drowned in sauce.  When I see meat swimming in sauce I figure they're covering up something about the meat. 

I grew up eating ribs at a little place in the middle of nowhere, in Ohio.  Ohio is not known for barbecue, but we do ribs pretty well; often someone moved here from far away, or visited and brought back something they loved.  Ohio tends to have a blend of styles and meats, so you can try a little of everything.  I still go back to that place once in awhile.  It's simple, and cheap, and good.  I try barbecue wherever I go.  I'm often disappointed, since the definition is so broad and tastes vary.  Many people talk about meat "falling off the bone," which sounds nice in theory and is a bit of a euphemism.  I have had meat shlurp right off the bone when I pick it up, and it's hard to eat that way.  Plus, it has probably been boiled or otherwise wrongly- or over-cooked, and has little flavor.  But boy is it tender!  Anyway, I prefer flavor.  Dry rubs are usually best; a little sauce at the end sometimes adds a little, but usually covers up the meat.

I'm a rib fan.  Miss Mox loves brisket.  We both can go for good pulled pork.  She shies away from the odder meats and sauces, whereas I am tempted to try them.  As you read this, I am probably stuffed with Texas brisket (and kolache, but that's another story.)

Loving Love

The other day was Loving Day.  Did you notice?  Maybe you don't think about it, but it's important to Miss Mox and me.  (It's also Mama Mox's birthday, so it's super important to us...)  On June 12th, 1967, in the case of Mildred and Peter Loving vs. Virginia, the Supreme Court said it was legal for interracial couples to marry.  It had been illegal in more than a dozen states (some of the laws were on the books till 2000, if you can believe that, but were unenforceable.)  When people say that kind of racism was in the ancient past, I wonder just how old they think I am (almost as old as this decision.)  Nowadays it's not a big deal, though we get occasional looks and comments.  Our family and friends are very supportive.  Nationally, things are pretty good, though a church in the south refused to marry a mixed couple last year.  I make a strong connection between IR marriage and gay marriage, but I've written plenty about that elsewhere.  People should be free to marry the person they love.  Your religion, or biases, or hate, should have no impact on how I live my life.  Someone told me "well, I wasn't raised that way, and I won't let my kids do that."  Hm, were you raised by wolves?  And why would you pass that nastiness on to your children?

I saw racism a little growing up, especially on visits to the southern U.S.  As I got older I noticed it more up north too.  Since I was interested in history I read plenty about it, and was always confused by it.  It just seemed, and seems, so pointless, so silly, and so hateful.   I was brought up to treat people as people, as individuals, not to avoid people  or make fun of them because of their race, or religion, or name.

I dated black girls before, and would have dated pretty much anyone- white, black, Mexican, Chinese, whatever.  I was a shy nerd, and only asked a few girls out, and only got a few dates in general; if I'd been more confident I would have asked more women out and dated a veritable United Nations.

I didn't fall in love with Miss Mox because she is black, but I love that about her just as I love all aspects of her.  It's a big part of who she is, but it's not all of her.  I've learned a lot about black culture.  I studied history so I knew a lot intellectually, but seeing things in person is different.

You know, "mixed marriages" have always gotten some pushback.  Catholic and Protestant, Irish and German... There are always people who are opposed.  "Think of the children- they'll have such a hard time bridging the gap!"  Yeah, probably not.  People who protest about that aren't really thinking about the children, they're thinking about themselves and how much trouble they will have behaving like a decent person.  And hey, racially mixed babies tend to be very cute.  They are raised by parents who know about diversity and tolerance.  Some people hate that, because they want everyone to be like them- close-minded and intolerant.

I am amused by the serendipity that lead the Lovings to lead the way on love.  Loving Day has multiple meanings.  Love who you love.  Love who you want.  Don't let little things get in the way, and definitely don't let what other people would think get in the way.

Nothing Changes

I remember as a kid reading the paper my parents saved from the day I was born.  "Race riots" were the big headline, along with B-52 raids on Vietnam.  I read those articles and I don't remember thinking "those lazy thugs, they're burning their own houses."  But then, I guess I wasn't a conservative.  I realized that the people in those cities must have been really upset about something, and that not all of them were burning things down.

There were more than 150 race riots in 1967.  Many places were like powderkegs, the people trapped in a bad situation, and a spark- then and now- like unjust policing, set things off.

There are underlying issues of poverty, racism, education, etc.  Many people, mainly conservatives but plenty of liberals, say "We have to stop the violence, then we'll deal with the rest of it."  Well, we always stop the violence, but forget about the rest.  And so the headlines are the same today.  History doesn't matter to some people, so we keep repeating it.

Listen- most cops are decent people.  But the bad ones should be held accountable.  Most protestors are decent people.  But the bad ones should be held accountable.  The point here, though, the problem, is that violent protestors are arrested, while violent cops are not.  That's the reason for the protests.  The fact that some people can't see the difference, or choose not to, is a big part of the problem.  Willful ignorance, my old nemesis, contributes to these situations and the fact that they keep happening. 

If someone gets choked to death by police for selling cigarettes, black or white, we should all be upset about it.  They should have to pay a fine, not die.  The problem is, a lot of people aren't upset when it happens to someone who's black.  "Well, he deserved it," when if it happens to a white guy there are always mitigating factors and sympathy.  Which brings us back to "Black lives matter."  Which reminds us that black lives matter, too.  It's not a statement that only black lives matter.  If you think saying that black lives matter is racist, you need to reexamine your life, and not act like someone from "The Wizard of Oz" who is missing both a heart and a brain.